Love Will Not Go With You To The Pharmacy To Pick Up Your Prescription Meds For The STDs

[Alberta Parish]

February 14, 2009

“Love Will Not Go With You To The Pharmacy To Pick Up Your Prescription Meds For The STDs”

Written by Alberta Parish

In reference to my February 11 blog titled, Chris Brown Allegedly Beat Rihanna Like You’d Beat A Grown Man, I’ve gotten a few comments. I’ve given some thought to those comments in response to my blog, and I realize that I do have a problem with certain aspects of life, mainly my life. There are certain things that irritate the hell out of me, and I’m in the process of changing those things that I don’t like. As far as the comments I’d made in my blog about not feeling sorry for girls who remain in abusive relationships, that tolerate cheating, verbal abuse/threats, emotional/psychological/physical abuse, being stuck with a litter of kids by several different baby daddies – none of whom were their husbands to begin with, and also not feeling sorry for women who knew their husbands were committing adultery, and as a result, contracted venereal diseases, I meant every word. At the end of the day, you must have enough self-love and common sense to leave abusive relationships. Whatever you have to do, if that includes filing a restraining order, moving to another county (sometimes even another state), you have to protect yourself and the children. Unfortunately, many women have children with abusive partners, which make the environment even more stressful and dangerous. Since I do have a problem with certain aspects of life, this would be one of those problems. Another problem I have is people putting their children in harm’s way and not adequately providing for their children. Another problem is abuse. This entails physical, verbal, mental and sexual abuse. Whatever love I may accumulate for a man (even if we’re married), it will go completely out the window if he cheats on me, slaps me upside my head, bloodies my lip and nose, hits any children that we have, or gives me an STD of any kind. If I go to the clinic for an STD, the nurse and doctor are not going to pat me on my back, look at me with great respect, and commend me for having so much love for my husband or baby daddy that I stayed in a broken relationship long enough to contract the STD. LOVE will not go with me to the pharmacy to pick up my prescription meds for the STD(s) that I contracted (never had any STDs in my life) from my husband or my baby daddy. LOVE is not going with me to the emergency clinic every time he beats the hell out of me. But love for myself will pack my belongings and get as far away from him as possible, or if the apartment/house belongs to me, love will make me change every lock and all his belongings will be sitting on the porch before he arrives.

Unfortunately, there are many women who have low self-esteem and no self-love, and therefore, they allow toxic relationships to persist in their lives. Then they complain about the horrible treatment they get from their husband or baby daddy. Why are you still with him? I mean the obvious answer you give to people is you love him, but love is not going to beat you down in front of the kids. Love is not going to give you HIV. If anything, love is protective. Love is not going to leave you holding the bag with five, six, or seven kids to rear by yourself with no physical, emotional and financial help. Why do you love somebody who obviously doesn’t love you back? Why would you want to be with somebody who doesn’t think too highly of you as a person? Why would you remain with a guy or girl who gave you Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, etc.? Oh, I forgot, it’s love. Plain old-fashioned love, right? Wrong. What is love? Do you even know what love is? Does love hurt? Is love supposed to hurt to the point that he or she put you in the hospital where you’re fighting for your life, because he/she just shot you in the head?

Domestic violence doesn’t just start with a simple act of him slapping you in the face. Domestic violence begins with verbal and emotional abuse. It begins with him forcing himself upon you when you emphatically tell him no. And of course, these acts are committed repeatedly over a long period of time. Then one day, when you least expect, he slaps you in the face, producing blood from your lip or nose, or even both. Domestic violence also begins with him or her constantly belittling the children and calling little girls in the household sluts and whores, and also making hurtful remarks to the boys.